Pornography is everywhere, in all types of media; be it television, radio, books, magazines, movies, music, or video games. It has seeped into many places of society and has become pervasive to the point of being welcomed, glamorized, and expected.
Just the other day I was playing 'Battle of the Sexes' with my boyfriend and he pulled out one of the man cards that gives a funny little instance between a man and wife and how it affects your playing piece. It read, "She found your hidden playboy stash. Go back three spaces". I find several things terribly wrong with this. First, the man in the example is married. What does he need playboys for if he has a wife? Second, the man was looking after, lusting after women other than his wife. And all he gets is a slap on the wrist.
No. That is not right. Pornography should not be allowed, nor should it be expected, especially not in marriages whether it be with the man or woman.
Porn is highly addictive. Jeffrey Satinover, a psychiatrist and adviser said, "Pornography really does, unlike other addictions, biologically cause direct release of the most perfect addictive substances" (1). It is terrifying to think that it is that much more addictive than hard drugs. Marry Anne Layden, co-director of the Sexual Trauma and Psychopathology Program at the University of Pennsylvania's Center for Cognitive Therapy said, "porn is the most concerning thing to psychological health that I know of existing today" (2).
One of the main ways, as said earlier, of looking at porn is through the internet. Layden said, "The internet is the perfect drug delivery system because you are anonymous, aroused and have role models for these behaviors. To have drug pumped into your house 24/7, free, and children know how to use it better than grown-ups know how to use it--it's a perfect delivery system if we want to have a whole generation of young addicts who will never have the drug out of their mind" (3).
It also has terrible effects on the perception and relationships. When, just as an example, a man views pornography his view of sex and women is skewed. The women in the material cannot interact with him, nor do they hold emotions; they are objects. However, they are made to be "perfect" and ideal objects. The man's reality of how real women are is disrupted. His expectations of women and sex cannot be met. Rob Jackson, a Licensed Professional Counselor, said, "Once porn is downloaded into our mental hard drive through the portals of the senses, it works like a computer virus, corrupting our thoughts about sexuality. The contaminated files include our thoughts about being male or female, what we believe about our sexuality, how we plan to behave sexually, and whether we have the capacity to remain faithful in marriage" (4).
In the article "Things They're Saying" in the 1979 New Era, it said, "a person who feasts upon filthy stories or pornographic or erotic pictures and literature records them in this marvelous retrieval system we call a brain. The brain won’t vomit back filth. Once recorded, it will always remain subject to recall, flashing its perverted images across your mind and drawing you away from the wholesome things in life" (5). Not only is pornography addicting and damaging, it never goes away.
This filth effects future relationships and how people interact. Elder Dallin H. Oaks said, "Pornography impairs one’s ability to enjoy a normal emotional, romantic, and spiritual relationship with a person of the opposite sex. It erodes the moral barriers that stand against inappropriate, abnormal, or illegal behavior. As conscience is desensitized, patrons of pornography are led to act out what they have witnessed, regardless of its effects on their life and the lives of others" (6). Mary Anne Laydon also said, "The more pornography women use, the more likely they are to be victims of non-consensual sex. The earlier the male starts using pornography, the more likely they are to be the perpetrator of non-consensual sex" (7). A study by William Marshall showed that 87 percent of convicted molesters of girls and 77 percent of convicted molesters of boys admit to the use of pornography, most often in commission of their crimes (8).
Finally, pornography destroys the family unit. The man or woman who uses it cannot be satisfied by their spouse. They are no longer faithful in their marriage when they lust after some other person.
Pornography use is a vicious cycle that is hard to break. It begins with emotions being out of control. Perhaps needs are not being met. Then the person views pornography. Directly afterwards there are feelings of guilt, depression, and shame. Perhaps there is concealment, where the porn or actions taken to view it are hidden. The emotions of guilt and wanting to view the porn are back, so the person turns again to finding it. The cycle spirals on if it is not broken. But it is possible to stop and break away. Acknowledging the problem is a start. You can learn to control your emotions and immerse yourself in wholesome things. By completely removing yourself from porn you distract yourself. Turning to prayer and the Lord are the main steps to take. It is not easy, and the addiction is hard to break, but it can be done.
The reason it was sad and ironic that the two main uses of the internet were genealogy and pornography is clear now. Genealogy is about family, about the people who loved you and your ancestors. It is about uniting the family once again. Pornography destroys the family. It breaks up current and future relationships. It mocks the unity and sanctity of marriage that is ordained by God. It does everything in its power to end the family.
I will stand against pornography. I cannot support something that depicts men and women in such terrible ways, that makes a mockery of sex and marriage, that acts as a drug to our brains, that takes control of our lives, that destroys our relationships and spirit.
1, 2, 3: Ryen Singel. 'Internet Porn: Worse Than Crack?'. 11/19/04. http://www.wired.com/science/discoveries/news/2004/11/65772
4. Rob Jackson. 'The Effects of Prior Pornography Use on Marriage'. Pure Intimacy. 2011. http://www.pureintimacy.org/piArticles/A000000490.cfm
5. Challenges for the Year Ahead (pamphlet, 1974), 4–5; reprinted in “Things They’re Saying,” New Era, Feb. 1974, 18.
6. Dallin H. Oaks. Pornography. (2005, April).
7. Rachel B. Duke. 'More women lured to pornography addiction'. The Washington Times. June 11, 2011. http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2010/jul/11/more-women-lured-to-pornography-addiction/
8. See William Marshall, “A Report of the Use of Pornography by Sexual Offenders,” 1983, Ottawa, Canada.
9. Image: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:No_sign.png
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