Intimacy

Sexual intimacy in marriage is good. It’s supposed to happen. We’re supposed to have joy.

I just find it interesting how many LDS families sort of forget this or get away from it. I read a book a year ago in one of my marriage classes called Then Comes Marriage. It explained how many young couples are never taught about sexual intimacy. The wedding night is a big huge surprise and a huge commotion of misunderstanding and embarrassment. And that just sort of continues their whole marriage. (Not all the time of course. Just sometimes.) I think that if this does continue, if it gets to the point where the wife (or husband) doesn’t want to have sex ever (like it is portrayed in the media) then it causes some huge problems.

We talked about how we are always striving to meet our needs. However, when we go after things that are fake or don’t satisfy, our needs will never be met. In the case of sexual intimacy in marriage, if there is no intimacy the wife or husband will seek out satisfaction elsewhere. Intimacy is a real need. 

Pornography is very easy to find. There has been a huge explosion of erotica like 50 Shades of Grey and the film Magic Mike. There will always be opposition in all things, so these sorts of things will always be there. However, I think there has been an exponential growth in the access and varying kinds of porn for several reasons. First, fewer people are getting married. They never have that emotional intimacy with someone and try to satisfy it elsewhere. Also, there have been studies showing that married individuals have more sex than those that are single. Since there is less sex, erotica and porn will be sought after. (Not by everyone. This is just a broad statement.)

I think if we teach our children the sacredness and place of physical intimacy in marriage it will help them to understand why pornography is so evil and why sex in marriage is so important.